Grow rich, you fool

Being rich, universally accepted as the quintessential goal of life, is not extremely difficult. I mean, living poor may just be little more painful. At the base, it’s about amassing money, in some direct or indirect form. The experts prefer ‘worth’, ‘assets’ over ‘money’. That’s OK. I’ll lay out the basics of how to grow rich for the uninitiated.

There are exceptions to these guidelines, but they’re so small a community that you can feel free to ignore them. They’re currency wizards and hence don’t need me. There may be rags to riches stories floating around you. But those occurrences take place seldom and are too unpredictable to be followed. Some do make it playing by the book, I’m not denying it. Be good at what you can, let the world appreciate it and reward you back with money – it does happen, but may take a lifetime to reach the milestone. Besides, you have to be good at something; no child’s play! You may fatigue yourself beyond celebrating at the end of this slow path. My focus here is more on the ‘cool’ ways of making money; i.e., own money, burn it astray and yet leave enough to treat a few cancers across a few generations.

1.Get born

Have significant amount of money, to start with. Funny? Not at all. Contradiction? Not really. You need a sum today to seed your empire of net worth tomorrow. Can you start an engine without a drop of fuel? How to start? Simple – beg, borrow, steal. You can beg from a stranger or predecessors or in-laws. No harm in asking, if none is naturally benevolent toward you. You may borrow from a lender. You may choose not to repay or run away with the lot in which case it automatically converts into a steal! Try not to violate law as it may slow you down. Win a jackpot, if you’re too lazy. Keep your eyes, conscience and mind open, you’ll find ways to accumulate the seed. If you can’t, no need to read further!

2.Grow up

Don’t get complacent of the initial achievement. Remember, it’s just the beginning. Keep putting your money into different baskets of mixed fabrics and risk-to-reward ratio. These baskets are ‘investments’ to the experts. They’ll guide you, don’t worry, once you have made the first cut. Never feel content with what you have, retain the thirst to expand your horizon, as if you’ve countless generations to feed. Don’t weigh yourself down with negativities like questions on deservingness, plight of the homeless etc. Stay restless, look up to those who have more than you, for inspiration. Satisfaction is a mark of potential downfall from your current status. As you grow your cash reserve, the next generations unknowingly cement their footing.


Keep spending parts of it for fun, frolics and all that comes under the umbrella of ‘lifestyle’. It’s not easy to balance both the needs, a need to save it and multiply, another to consume or waste; but not difficult if you’re clear with your priorities. Unless you shell out money, others will not come to know where you stand. Show off to your peers and everyone else. The rich are rich only when they are known to be rich. Buy things which only you can afford, time and again; claim or settle things you can. Some of the things are fun, some are bizarre, some life-saving. Be a role mode to the vast humanity who aspire to be you. Preach the strugglers. A star shouldn’t shy away from the sun. Attend events, donate post a calamity, run marathon for a cause, be in a panel on media, speak for human rights, choose an alternative faith school, deal alternative issues with sensitivity – just be around as much as you can. Socialites are always the elite and look good in frames.
“If you are born poor it’s not your mistake, but if you die poor it’s your mistake.” – Bill Gates (may just be another popular misattribution)


Author: shban

Lost and never found

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