Et tu, Farhan?

Hrithik Roshan in 2015 and Farhan Akhtar now… you broke Indian hearts. You can’t announce divorce with your respective wives of one and half decades and meet the press to talk about privacy, amicable relationship, good parents etc. You’re not only good friends yourselves, you both stand for young successful B-town celebrities with looks, body, fame and money. You were our idols of super successful, domesticated, young, intelligent and down-to-earth, male specimens who are good as husbands, fathers and in sense of humor. Style icons, heart-throbs, suave, 8 packs and creative… it’s OK if you have flings here and there or just a pair of roving eyes, but you can’t play a cheap trick like divorce! We thought you are the best brought up kids too; with truckloads of Indian values. OK.. stop that violin, let’s get back to business. When an urban Indian life is about importing an American life as far as possible, divorce or separation between spouses is natural. If you don’t feel like being with your chosen partner, part ways. There is nothing bad about it, unless you prefer beating your spouse every now and then. As women are empowered to claim their independence, they don’t have a play a backstage fiddle at home with in-laws and kids. They have their career, their choices and that’s the only deviation I see from the great Indian values here. This so-called Indian ‘family value’ was based on the fact that women were slaves to their husbands. A daughter was a menace to a father. The only grooming made available to a daughter was learning how to win hearts. cook meals and bring up kids. Women were taught to consider their husbands as gods and look nowhere else apart from them barring an occasional visit to a theater looking at a shirtless Salman Khan. The absence of any career options or training or educational backing forced them accept their life as it was. Financial independence of women is inversely proportion to number of ‘happy’ couples in the society. Women, as they started earning their living, became less tolerant to all the unpleasant things or sheer apathy post-marriage and more vocal against men who mistreated or bored them. So we get divorce as a social norm. From the wealthy trickling down to the urban middle class… it’s out of the closet. We don’t have to whisper while gossiping about divorces. I’d say it’s not a bad deal… just the children shouldn’t be punished too much by their parents’ acrobatics. Bad matches or not-so-interesting conjugal ties were never so sacrosanct. Let women live on their will…. or at least search for more happiness. Who knows, if we welcome divorces just like marriages, we may not have to ban determination of sex of foetus in diagnostic clinics anymore. There will be hitches, greed, haste and misuses, but there will not be marital oppression. For males, there are samples who retain the marriage just to avoid hefty alimony – financial independence of wives may alleviate their pain too! The kids, who barely understand how they were born, will have a grueling phase early in their life before they turn ‘mature’.


Author: shban

Lost and never found

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